Stargate: Konoha
by Andrew Joshua Talon
Summary: In which Naruto Uzumaki discovers that curiosity isn't too lenient on foxes either. Crossover with Stargate: SG-1, among others. Rated for language, violence and innuendo.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Naruto, Stargate: SG-1 and all other assorted anime or TV series involved in this crossover are the property of their respective owners. No profit is being made on this work.

- - - - - -

_Yuki no Kuni_ (Snow Country)

"_RASENGAN!_"

An explosion rang out, sending a flock of birds scattering into the air. In the rocky clearing, Naruto was on his back, covered in dust and flecks of rock buried in his skin. With a coughing fit he slowly sat up, rubbing his head and glaring at a very large pile of rocks and dust.

"Ow... Damnit..." He'd slammed the Rasengan in a bit too deep on that one. Sure, it had rendered what had been a very large boulder into an equally large crater ringed by a pile of dust and debris. The resulting explosion had been pretty awesome too, but being at ground zero _really_ hurt.

"And blowing up people from the inside..." Naruto shuddered at the resulting mental image. He coughed and brushed the dust out of his hair.

Still, if he went up against anyone with chakra armor again, it should be an easier battle. Doto had beaten the _crap_ out of Sasuke and him, and he wasn't even a ninja! Actual ninjas with this technology would be a hell of a lot harder to beat, and at least one ninja had escaped with it.

Orochimaru would no doubt love to get his slimy hands on this, and after his near death experience, Naruto refused to take the chance.

Besides, he enjoyed blowing things up. This thought definitely made him grin.

"Naruto?"

Naruto turned around. "Hey Koyuki! What are you doing here?"

The princess of Yuki no Kuni smiled kindly back as she walked into the clearing Naruto was using for training, the palace some distance behind her.

"I just escaped my minders for a while," she grinned. "Always fussing over me..."

Koyuki blinked and made her way over to Naruto, putting a hand on his bleeding forehead.

"Are-Are you okay? Just what the heck did you do?" Koyuki asked. Naruto blushed a bit under the dust, and rubbed the back of his head.

"Uh... Well... New variation on a jutsu!" Naruto coughed again as Koyuki gaped at the crater.

"What, Blowing Yourself up Jutsu?" She asked. Naruto grinned.

"More like 'Blowing-up-Someone-Else-no-Jutsu'... That was a crater _this_ big!" Naruto illustrated, spreading his arms wide. Koyuki chuckled softly.

"Just try not to blow yourself up..."

"Relax," Naruto grinned, stumbling backwards towards the crater. "I'm going to be the Hokage! I'm definitely not going to-!"

With a step into the crater, the ground rumbled and cracked. Koyuki and Naruto's eyes met and widened simultaneously as the ground gave way and Naruto fell.

"OH SHIIITTTTTTTTTTT-!"

"NARUTO!" Koyuki shouted, rushing over to the hole. Ignoring the dirt getting on her fantastically expensive royal kimono, she stooped down onto her knees and bent down as far as she could, trying to see into the dark cavern below.

"NARUTO! NARUTO! CAN YOU HEAR ME?" She shouted. A pained groan was her response.

"Ow… Ow…"

Naruto pushed himself up to his feet, shaking his head. He rubbed the back of it with a wince.

"I'm fine…"

"Oh, good," the princess sighed in relief. Part of her mind berated her for thinking Naruto couldn't handle a little fall-He'd fallen into a frozen lake and come out alive, after all.

Below the musing Yukie, Naruto blinked and looked around, his eyes adjusting to the dark chamber.

"Huh… What is this…?" Naruto mumbled, running a hand over the wall. Carvings decorated the stone, elaborate figures and bizarre script that he couldn't read. Looking more closely at the far wall, he realized the cave was a chamber, covered top to bottom in strange symbols and images.

"Hey, Yuki-chan! There's all sorts of weird stuff down here!"

"What do you mean, weird stuff?" She called back curiously.

"Like, writing! And pictures carved on the walls!" Naruto wandered across the floor, now seeing that it was composed of carved stone sections, arranged around a central circle-shaped slab. He coughed a little at some dust, before spotting something out of the corner of his eye.

Koyuki had leaned as far down as she dared, looking into the chamber. Her eyes widened.

"Naruto! This is… This is incredible! You just found… You just found something! Like an ancient tomb, maybe!"

"Ancient tomb? What's that?" Naruto asked, heading for the strange object. It was held within the wall itself, as though partially buried, and resembled a large, round shield with a great red, round jewel in the center. Naruto touched it, rubbing away some of the dust, and blinked at the symbols this uncovered.

"It's where ancient kings and emperors would bury their dead!" Koyuki chuckled and shook her head. "Only you, Naruto, would stumble into something like this! This is just incredible!"

"I found something else! Like a… Shield, maybe?" Naruto called back. He pressed one of the symbols, and it lit up. Naruto's eyes did the same, and he grinned.

"Hey! It's not a shield-It's something else!"

"What?" Koyuki called. Naruto shook his head, and pressed a few more symbols on the device, which also lit up.

"Not sure… When I press these buttons, they light up!"

He pressed a sixth symbol, and the red jewel in the center began to glow. Naruto frowned, and extended his fingers towards it. Koyuki spotted this at last, and called out to him.

"Naruto, wait! You don't know what that-!"

The jewel was depressed, and it was at this point the chamber rumbled violently.

"Wh-What the-?!" Naruto tried to keep his balance, but a second later the sound like a very large engine revving twice filled the chamber, and the floor exploded from beneath him.

"WOOOAAHHH!" Naruto shouted, thrown off his feet. He slammed up against the roof of the chamber, instinctively sticking to it with chakra. Pieces of stone pelted him, making him wince. He heard Koyuki screamed and managed to tilt his head to see her.

"PRINCESS!"

Koyuki was hanging on for dear life to the edge of the hole in the roof, kicking her legs uselessly. She looked down in fright, and Naruto soon saw why.

The stone slab floor was gone, replaced with a shimmering pool of what _looked_ like water. However, something in the back of Naruto's mind instinctively told him that it wasn't anything of the kind. Koyuki was losing her grip, about to fall in, and this spurred Naruto into action.

"Hang on!" Naruto shouted, crawling awkwardly along the roof. Pieces of stone fell away as he moved, dropping into the pool below. Naruto sped up, as another pieces of the roof fell away from Koyuki's grip, leaving her with one hand. She looked over her shoulder, eyes wide in fear.

"NARUTO!"

"Don't worry! I've got you!" Naruto shouted, flipped over to stick to the wall across from Koyuki. He crawled up again, and wrapped an arm securely around her waist. The roof shuddered, but he still managed a comforting smile as he pushed her up back onto the surface.

"See? Nothing to worry-!"

The roof rumbled one last time, and simply… Fell. The entire section Naruto was sticking to dropped away, Koyuki barely tumbling away. As if in slow motion, she saw Naruto's eyes widen, almost comically, as he fell with the stone, dropping right into the shimmering pool and vanishing into it.

- - - - - - -

As he slammed into the surface of the pool, Naruto felt immensely cold, Koyuki's screams abruptly cut off as he was engulfed entirely. There was a massive rush, as though he were traveling at great speed. Then the briefest vision of countless stars, spread out before him, before a bright flash of light brought with it his restored senses, warm sunlight, momentum carrying him forward and down.

_THUD!_

"GAH! DAMNIT!"

Naruto groaned, the heavy weight of the stone slab pressing him down into what felt like grass. Gritting his teeth, he pushed chakra into his limbs and slammed back against the stone, managing to lift it off of his body. With a loud grunt he brought his fingers together into the ram seal.

"_Kage Bunshin no jutsu!"_

A symphony of pops and poofs brought forth a dozen of his clones, and suddenly Naruto was being crushed again, this time by both the stone _and_ his duplicates.

"GAH!" Naruto shouted, kicking himself out from under the slab. His clones cried out as they were crushed, and as one they poofed into smoke, returned to the ether from which they'd come. Naruto winced and stood up, gritting his teeth against the pain. He could walk it off, he knew, but it still hurt like hell.

"Damnit…"

He looked at the shimmering pool of light, and then took it in. It was contained within a great metal ring, symbols orderly marking it on an interior wheel within it. Nine… Locks, he guessed, were at various spots on the ring, one at the very top.

And not too far away was a device like the shield, only mounted on a small pedestal. Shaking his head, Naruto started back for the Stargate, breaking into a run to throw himself back through-

The pool vanished and Naruto landed on the other side of the great ring in a crouch. He looked over his shoulder and snarled.

"Damnit… What the…?" He stood up and began looking around, belatedly recalling some of Iruka's advice about being in unfamiliar territory.

Of course, Iruka hadn't covered going through a Stargate, had he?

_Stargate…_ The unfamiliar word entered his mind again, causing him to blink in confusion. He looked at the Stargate again.

_Stargate? … This is a Stargate… But why…?_

He shook his head. That wasn't important. Whatever it was called, it had brought him here, and he needed to figure out where "here" was.

He was standing on a wide, open plain, a grassland of some sort. Mountains could be seen in the distance, their dull gray coloration in stark contrast to the bright green plains at their feet. A few sparse white clouds dotted the sky above, but this wasn't what made Naruto double take.

Alongside a familiar sun, was a not-so-familiar smaller sun. Naruto felt his jaw dropped, and he stared stupidly upwards.

"… _Kai!"_ Naruto called out, putting his hands together in a seal to defeat any genjutsu. He tried again when nothing changed. "_Kai! Kai! Kai!"_

Nothing. Naruto looked back at the pedestal device.

"Of course!" He rushed over to it, and grinned when he saw that all of the symbols on the device were the same as on the device he'd used, and on the Stargate!

"YES! Okay… Um…" Naruto blinked as his brain finally caught up with his actions.

"I hit a bunch of symbols to get here… And there are lots of them on this one, so…"

Naruto's shoulders slumped. He didn't even remember the symbols he'd hit to get _here!_ How was he supposed to get back home if he didn't have the slightest idea of what symbols he needed to press?

"Well… I guess there's only one thing to do," Naruto decided. He looked over the symbols, and placed a hand over his eyes, as he raised his other hand to hit the first symbol it found.

- - - - - - -

Another scratch in the wood, another day past.

Naruto sighed, and stood up, tucking the small stick into his back pocket. He'd taken to carrying it everywhere, stuck in his pouch. He'd scratched ten marks into it, which meant he had been lost for, at least, ten days. But in all honesty, he wasn't sure. Every… World, he figured was the best term, was different in where it's sun, suns, even moons were positioned, so really, he was going by the time in between his stomach growling.

What else could he do?

The first random set of symbols he'd dialed, he'd gotten the Stargate to work again. He leaped through it… Only to not end up back home.

So, without any better ideas, he'd started 'gating from world to world, dialing random addresses and sometimes getting help from the locals. That was another thing that confused Naruto-Why were aliens not like those he'd read about in manga back home?

No tentacles, no scary teeth-Just humans: Though they kept talking about "gods" who traveled in ships so maybe they were just the exception.

"Guh… Hot," Naruto mumbled. He yanked off his jacket and tied it around his waist. He stretched and grimaced, as he looked out over the desert sands surrounding the Stargate. Naruto held up a flat hand over his eyes, squinting. He couldn't see much other than dunes, aside from a few scattered ancient ruins buried in the sand. He'd come across a _lot_ of ruins, more than he'd come across living people.

Naruto wondered if that was a bad sign. He walked over to a stone pillar, looking it up and down. The writing here looked pretty familiar. Sure, he couldn't actually _read_ it, but he recognized a lot of the characters. They were the same as in that chamber he'd first fallen into.

The Stargates… This writing… Somehow, even these flying "gods". Naruto didn't know why but there seemed to be a connection between them all. He ran his hand down the stone… And immediately regretted it.

"_OW! FUCK!"_ He shouted, shaking his hand and wincing. "Hot!"

This world was _definitely_ not home, so he headed for the dialing device and dialed another random address. As soon as the Stargate activated he walked through.

Trees, mountains and a cooler climate greeted him on the other side... But not home. Not unless all the trees had suddenly sprouted giant spikes. Besides, there wasn't a single chakra signature aside from the usual low-level readings associated with plant and animal life.

Naruto growled even as the Stargate deactivated behind him, and walked down the steps of the platform, kicking a nearby rock.

"Damnit!"

He pulled out a scrap of scroll paper, on which he'd written dozens of gate addresses. He scratched off another possible. Naruto sighed glumly, looking over the control console on this 'Gate.

He'd never been very good at math, but even he knew how unlikely finding his home was through random chance. He clenched his fist and shook his head.

"No... I'll find my way home, no matter what! Because I have to be Hokage!" Naruto shouted into the woods.

That was his goal. Everything he had done had been to ascend to that level, to gain the respect he deserved, to protect everyone he had grown close to. Everyone he cared for.

He didn't expect an answer from the woods… And he received none. All the same, he nodded and turned to head back to the control device, ready to input another set of symbols.

Before he could, however, the Stargate activated behind him. With a yelp he dove and hit the ground, avoiding the initial blast.

"HEY!" Naruto shouted angrily, stomping up to the threshold of the Stargate. "HEY! What the hell do you think you're-!"

_WHAM!_

- - - - - - - -

_P7G-224_

Colonel Jack O'Neill ran into the small body and fell down the platform steps.

"OW! Damnit!"

His knee again... He was shoved off whoever he'd fallen on and soon came face to face with an angry-looking blonde kid with whiskers, a metal plate tied to his head... And the worst fashion sense in the universe.

The boy growled something that didn't sound remotely flattering. Jack blinked, even as the rest of SG-1 came through. Daniel looked bemused, Carter concerned and Teal'c merely raised an eyebrow.

"... Daniel? What'd he say?" Jack asked calmly.

The anthropologist coughed.

"Er… I don't think you want to know."

Jack nodded.

"I didn't think so…"

- - - - - -

**BEGIN STARGATE: KONOHA**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Naruto, Stargate: SG-1 and all other assorted anime or TV series involved in this crossover are the property of their respective owners. No profit is being made on this work.

- - - - - -  
_  
Yuki no Kuni_ (Snow Country)

_Nine Days Ago_

The symbols across the rust-colored walls were carved deep into the rock, readable, Sakura supposed, by the blind. Or the people who made them wanted to make sure that even sealed in this chamber, whatever they had recorded would remain no matter what happened.

She shook her head, scanning the writing, as Kakashi and Princess Koyuki stood in the center of the great round ring at the bottom of the chamber. Sasuke sat on the edge of the pit, above the metal ring, his eyes scrutinizing everything with almost his usual cool.

There was slight tension in his eyes, a clear sign of irritation. She found herself wondering if he was trying to hold back his worry for Naruto as she was.

Yes, she was worried about Naruto. She could admit it to herself…  
**  
Strange…  
**  
What? She asked her inner self, gaze wandering back to the wall carvings, and thankfully interrupting her thoughts on Naruto. She tried to not think too much about him these days.  
**  
I think I can understand this…  
**  
Understand…?

Symbols seemed to align, blocky text came together and Sakura's eyes widened in realization.

"I'm afraid I've never run into anything remotely like this," Kakashi was saying behind her to the princess, a number of rescue workers still combing the area near the fallen chamber above them.

"Are you sure he fell in?"

"Positive. He… He kept me from falling in," Koyuki trailed off, wringing her robes. Sasuke frowned, scrutinizing the strange shield-like device with his Sharingan.

"What do you see, Sasuke?" Kakashi asked.

"Numerous symbols… Don't know what they mean, but there are thirty-nine of them. This red jewel in the center is producing some sort of… Energy."

The busted, red jewel. As though mocking them, a jagged piece of rock stuck out of the smashed sphere.

"Chakra?" Kakashi asked. Sasuke shook his head.

"No… It's… Being differently interpreted by my brain."

"Electromagnetic radiation," Sakura mumbled. Feeling eyes on her, she turned around and coughed.

"E-Electromagnetic radiation… It comes in many forms, not just light," Sakura explained. Kakashi blinked, as did Sasuke. Koyuki frowned and nodded.

"I think I read a magazine article about something like that…"

"Y-Yeah, me too," Sakura explained. Kakashi frowned and crossed his arms.

"What else have you discovered, Sakura?" Kakashi asked. Sakura winced-That man was just too perceptive sometimes.

"Well… I'm not sure but… I think I can read some of this." She turned back to the wall and frowned.

"How? How would you be able to read it-?" Koyuki began, before Kakashi raised his hand.

"Your majesty… Sakura is not in the habit of lying," Kakashi stated. Sakura refocused, the symbols changing from indecipherable carvings to readable language.

"The… chappa'ai? The ring, I think… Brought salvation to few gods as they fled from the living fires, smiting the land wherever they… Stepped? Were?" Sakura shook her head. "Can't read that… Something about the form of the fires…"

Her stomach clenched.

"Nine of them… And descriptions…"

Sakura slid her hands over crude figures drawn into the stone, now frighteningly familiar from her studies. A one-tailed tanuki, a two-tailed cat…

A nine-tailed fox, above the rest. She shivered as the scratches in the stone revealed it's leering smile.

"The Tailed Beasts," Kakashi stated, his single visible eye narrowing. He turned to the dialing device and sighed.

"I'm guessing without this… We're not going anywhere?" He asked. Sakura shook her head.

"No… The text says that you need seven symbols to activate the Stargate. And the device is, well…" She shrugged helplessly. Kakashi hummed as Koyuki fretted.

"But, we can't just…! I'll get my engineers on it, they can decipher-!"

"It won't be enough," Sakura stated quietly. She walked over to the dialing device, Sasuke raising an eyebrow at her as she lifted the jagged stone out of the crushed central jewel. With a grunt she dropped it to the ground, and peered inside.

As with the carvings, some of the interior of the device "made sense". Sakura shook her head.

"These crystals… Sasuke, can you get a look at them for me?"

Raising his other brow at Sakura leaving off the "-kun" to his name, he nevertheless complied, peering in with his bloodline.

"Now, tell me… The energy you saw before… Is it coming from the crystals?"

"Yes."

"Is it in a pattern? Like, pulsing?" Sakura asked again. Sasuke's frown deepened, but he looked anyway.

"No."

"Exactly what are you doing?" The princess asked. Sakura sighed and rubbed her oft-remarked upon forehead.

"Look… The Stargate doesn't run on nothing. This thing is likely both a power source, and a control device. The only energy signature is coming from this thing, right Sasuke?"

"Hn," the Uchiha grunted in the affirmative. Kakashi's own frown deepened.

"Stargate?"

"Well… it's the closest translation of chappa'ai that I could come up with," Sakura replied, sounding a little irritated.  
**  
Hey, don't be mad at me. I don't know how we know this,** Inner Sakura replied. Sakura took a deep breath.

"The point is, this technology isn't as simple as simply plugging in a chakra battery. I'm betting the energy is input into the Stargate in a certain way to make it do certain things."

"Like a seal would for chakra," Kakashi stated. Sakura nodded.

"Exactly… To make this thing work again, we need a lot of power, a sealing master… And preferably someplace secure to hold it."

"Secure?" Sasuke asked. Sakura looked at him.

"Sasuke, this device… This Stargate… The text says the gods went through it. Now, wherever it goes, it might lead to where the people who made them are right now. The 'gods', if you'd like."

"Not to mention if the device requires seven symbols," Kakashi began, "it might connect to other devices like it… Somewhere else."

"Somewhere else? Where? Outer space?" Koyuki asked incredulously. "This whatever-it-is swallowed Naruto up! Just what do you need to get it working again so you can go after him?"

Kakashi looked at Sakura. She sighed.

"At the moment… Snow Country is still recovering economically. It has no military force to speak of, and the engineers? Well, they'd help but the best way to input and control chakra to do what you want it to do… Is through seal work. Extensive seal work."

"… You want to take it with you, don't you?" The princess realized. "Back to Konoha."

Sakura shrugged helplessly. The princess mulled it over.

"How would you get it there?"

"Train? Ship? We'd get it there somehow… We have to," Sakura said firmly. "It's the only way to get Naruto back."

Kakashi hummed. "I'll contact Tsunade-sama… Inform her of the situation. I'll have to request a lot of manpower…"

"We'll need Jiraiya-sama as well," Sakura stated. Kakashi nodded, turning and vanishing in a poof of smoke. Koyuki looked at Sakura in mild disbelief, as did Sasuke. Nervously, Sakura turned back to the wall carvings, studying them.

She had no idea where any of that had come from… But all she knew was that if it got them Naruto back, then she really didn't care.

- - - - - -


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Naruto, Stargate: SG-1 and all other assorted anime or TV series involved in this crossover are the property of their respective owners. No profit is being made on this work.

* * *

Naruto emerged from the Stargate shivering slightly. It had felt weird this time... He looked up and quickly surveyed his new surroundings.

Lots of men dressed like the four people he'd met and with bigger versions of the weapons they wielded stood on the ground floor of the large, concrete room. Naruto looked up, jaw dropping as he saw the walls of the room go up, and up, and up until he could barely see the roof. Looking straight ahead, he could see a room through large windows, perhaps a control center of some sort, with a bald guy standing like he was the one in charge.

"Naruto," the guy wearing glasses spoke. He turned and looked over at him. His name was Daniel, he knew that much.

"Yes?"

He spotted a short redheaded woman in a white robe enter the room.

"This is Healer Frasier... She's going to look at you and make sure you're healthy," Daniel spoke. Naruto blinked. The language was a little weirder than he was used to, but he found he could understand it fairly well.

"Eh? But I feel fine!

"It's so we make sure you don't get sick from us, or us from you," Daniel explained. Naruto scowled.

"But I'm not sick!"

The guy named Jack (who Naruto obviously couldn't forget) turned to Naruto and reached out a hand.

"We all get exams after every mission... Checkups. It's a pain, but what are you going to do?" He gave Naruto a knowing smile. Naruto looked over at Frasier, who looked on disapprovingly, almost like Tsunade-baa-chan back home. At Jack's innocent look, Naruto couldn't help but crack a smile.

_Maybe doctors are the same everywhere?_ He thought, and allowed himself to be led away. The rest of the team followed behind, talking amongst themselves in that other language. Weird... It almost sounded like he could understand it...

"-when were you going to tell me you could speak Japanese?" Daniel asked flatly.

"When you wouldn't want me to help you with translation," Jack returned.

"Seriously sir, how'd you pick that up?" Sam asked, bringing up the rear. She caught him looking and smiled back.

"Oh, here and there..."

"And how many languages do you actually speak?" Daniel asked.

"A couple..."

"Jack!"

"What? You love translating! You live for translating!"

"Yes, yes, but I could always use more help!"

"Daniel, do you really want me around all the time, working over your shoulder?"

"You hang around all the time anyway, you would just be _working."_

"Well that's no fun," Jack said. "Besides, I don't speak many other languages than Japanese..."

"He helps Cassandra with her German and Spanish classes," Doctor Frasier spoke, as they all entered a room with beds on wheels, curtains, and equipment everywhere. Naruto pegged it as an infirmary, while Jack looked positively betrayed.

"Doc! You promised!"

"Daniel, can you tell him-?" Janet asked. Daniel nodded.

"Naruto, she needs you to-"

"Get on the bed, right?" Naruto asked. He hopped up and grinned. "I've been to the doctor's before."

"He says he's been to the doctor's before," Daniel supplied. He glared at Jack, who shrugged.

"All right... Tell him I'm going to test his eyes," Janet said.

"Don't mind the writing light of doom, it's just a simple test" Jack translated. Naruto blinked.

"Huh? Writing light of-ACK!" He shut his eyes tightly as Frasier shined a very bright light into them. "Hey! What the hell?"

"It's to test your eyes," Daniel quickly said. "Just relax... We're all going through it."

Jack looked dramatically frightened, which made Naruto chuckle. He tolerated the remaining tests, up until she produced a needle.

"Oh no," Naruto said, backing away. "No way!"

Dr. Frasier recognized the fear, and, in a way so like Baa-chan, she gave him a disapproving look.

"Daniel, can you-?"

"It's just a simple test," Daniel said quickly. "Won't hurt a bit."

"No way! I'm not letting that vampire have my blood!" He looked to Carter, who was being tested nearby, and gave her puppy dog eyes.

"Big Sister Sam, don't let her take my blood!"

"It's not going to hurt you, I promise," Sam said comfortingly. She got up and placed a hand on his shoulder, and smiled.

"Just relax," Jack added from his own bed. Teal'c sat nearby, looking a bit comical with a thermometer in his mouth. Naruto grumbled, but grudgingly held out his arm.

"Good, all right..." The doctor slid the needle into the crook of his elbow, and began drawing blood. Naruto had seen enough of his own to be very disinterested, and he breathed a sigh of relief when it was over.

"And for being so very patient..." Frasier produced a lollipop and handed it to Naruto. The blonde sniffed the candy, then opened it up. He grinned.

"Hey, thanks Big Sister Frasier!" He began sucking on the lollipop. Daniel and Sam looked over at the doctor.

"What? It works wonders on children, and my more difficult patients," Janet said defensively.

"Well, it's just that you never give us lollipops when we visit," Sam said. Janet sighed.

"If I did, I'd probably be buying out entire candy stores..."

"We don't get injured _that_ much," Jack whined from his bed. Janet just shot him a glare, as Naruto enjoyed the strange but definitely nice candy.

Maybe being lost on other planets wasn't so bad...

* * *

_Sorry for the short update... But it's better than nothing, right?_


End file.
